For those who haven’t been here before (tsk tsk) in the past weeks I’ve featured some writer friends who have some excellent books out this year. I asked them to send me their latest book, their tagline and a short piece of advice they wanted to pass on to writers, especially those still seeking publication. Last week CRYSTAL COLLIER with her books, MOONLESS AND SOULLESS This week I have an old friend of mine, JENN HUBBARD. We debuted together, and she writes some excellent books. UNTIL IT HURTS TO STOP (Viking 2013) is her latest.
Available at B&N |
Jenn’s advice is quite similar to Medeia’s, but while Medeia’s focused on young adult writing, I think Jenn opens it up to include writing across all categories. At the word level, the danger in following this advice might be in our trying to impress the reader with our knowledge of those stupendous–sublime–exotic adjectives and adverbs.
I love all of our words, but we risk falling into the quick fix called “telling” when we grab for the adjective or adverb and don’t create images with active verbs to “show” what we mean by things like, “Marsha was repulsed by her mother.” For me, a better way to capture that repulsion is through action. “I wanted to strangle Mother, but I’d have to touch her do it.” That last sentence gives me the chills. The first one, not so much. What do you think?
Long and Short Reviews 7th
Anniversary Bash
You can find them on FB and follow on TWITTER |
My quote for the day: “If you chase two rabbits, you catch none.” Confucius
Yvonne Ventresca says
Great advice!
Yvonne
Catherine Stine says
I think in terms of the word usage, sometimes telling has its place. Though that last quote IS quite chilling. Fantasies and interior thoughts can be used effectively for a variety of things in novels.
Empty Nest Insider says
There's a huge difference between the two sentences! I'll have to remember the "show don't tell" rule! Thanks Lee and Jenn!
Julie
Heather Holden says
Great advice today! The bit about "telling" can easily apply to comics, too. (Not allowing the art itself to tell the story and relying too much on dialogue/narration, for example.)
C. Lee McKenzie says
Of course. And I hadn't thought about that in comics. Thanks for adding to the discussion.
Southpaw HR Sinclair says
Oooo, that second sentence it nice.
Melissa says
Excellent example. Chilling is right!
Crystal Collier says
Excellent advice, and I LOVE that example. There are definitely strong ways to help readers feel an experience, we just have to be ambitious enough to write them in. Of course, who doesn't want to be a lazy writer on occasion?
Tara Tyler R says
great tagline! and very good advice – know your audience & dont underestimate them!
also checkig out LASR! thanks!
Carol Kilgore says
Great advice about showing. And I loved the quote!
TBM says
Ah yes my editor will agree. She likes to point out when I slip into telling.
C. Lee McKenzie says
Hurray for editors!
Hilary Melton-Butcher says
Hi Lee and Jenn – I quite agree with the sentences – the first one put me off. We never know where our social media will go in this day and age, let alone a book … but you're right – write well and write imaginatively with caution.
Cheers Hilary
C. Lee McKenzie says
We can only get better, right? At least that's the goal.
Lynda R Young says
Great showing example. It does take a little more thought to show rather than tell, but the payback is worth it.
C. Lee McKenzie says
Thank heaven for first drafts, second drafts and tenth drafts. 🙂
Stephanie Faris says
I was judging a contest where I was reading self-published books and I was amazed how often authors didn't follow the "show don't tell" rule. I think these rules have to be reiterated because there are a lot of newer authors who don't know about them. Showing IS much more powerful than telling, for sure!
C. Lee McKenzie says
It's a balancing act, isn't it?
Arlee Bird says
I used to chase Bunnies and never caught any–Confucius was right. Oh wait, he said rabbits. Nevermind.
Arlee
Tossing It Out
C. Lee McKenzie says
You must keep the bunnies and the rabbits straight.
Medeia Sharif says
Love the advice and I like the difference in those sentences.
That saying is so true.
C. Lee McKenzie says
Thanks, Medeia.
Jennifer R. Hubbard says
Thanks for hosting me, Lee.
I think the trick is knowing when to tell and when to show. Telling is good for summary; showing belongs in scene. If Marsha's repulsion for her mother is an important part of the book, showing will be better–in fact, essential.
C. Lee McKenzie says
It does take practice to know when summary is perfect and showing is preferred. Great to have you here, Jenn. We've hung out together for a while now. 🙂
Beverly Stowe McClure says
Great advice. I know to "show" not "tell" and thought I was doing it until an editor told me otherwise. She pointed out places where I was telling. Back to the drawing board.
Congratulations to Jennifer on the book. It sounds like a good one.
Jennifer R. Hubbard says
Thank you!
Shooting Stars Mag says
I do agree with this advice, and you're right, the second line you shared would have me much more intrigued!
C. Lee McKenzie says
That second one creates a question, doesn't it?
Christine Rains says
Great quote! And I love Jennifer's cover. Have a lovely week. 🙂
Jennifer R. Hubbard says
Thanks! I was happy with the cover, too.
Sherry Ellis says
I like the quote. Certainly something to make you think!
Mark Noce says
It's all balance and what works best for you. Sometimes a "tell" can be more showy than a "show," if that makes sense. It all depends on the context of the story. Also, nice Confucius quote:)
Deb says
I so agree on the advice and when the writer does it really well our imaginations are allowed to fill in and…run wild!
C. Lee McKenzie says
You touch on another part of this writing. What's too much? What's not enough? We have to decide what to leave to our readers and what to spell out. Quite a challenge.
Patricia Lynne says
Those two examples are excellent. The sentences about touching her did give me chills.
C. Lee McKenzie says
I was wondering where I could use that. 🙂
Dianne K. Salerni says
Hello to Jenn Hubbard!! I'm happy to say that I know her In Real Life, and her advice is spot on!
C. Lee McKenzie says
That's wonderful! Give her a hug for me.
Jennifer R. Hubbard says
🙂 Thanks, Dianne!
Theresa Milstein says
It's amazing that even with a big concept, it still has to work at the word-choice level. That touch line grabbed me too!
C. Lee McKenzie says
Sometimes I agonize over the right word.
L. Diane Wolfe says
I'd have to touch her to do it. That is a very chilling line.
C. Lee McKenzie says
It does bring up some questions, doesn't it?
Sarah Foster says
The second sentence definitely leaves a bigger impact. I think it's tricky to go through a manuscript and try to get rid of all those "telling" moments. Sometimes it takes a lot of work.
C. Lee McKenzie says
Oh yes. Sometimes I just don't "see" them.
Bish Denham says
I get such a sense of longing in the cover of Jennifer's book. And yes, there's much more punch in the second sentence.
C. Lee McKenzie says
I think you chose the right word, Bish. Longing is perfect.
Alex J. Cavanaugh says
Big difference in the two sentences.
That advice is what I would give as well, but for different reasons. I learned after my first book not to underestimate who my audience would be.
C. Lee McKenzie says
Yes. We do learn by our experience, all right. Best way, but also the hardest.